: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
