if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I had to cum in my sink.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
