69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
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