I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
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