i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
