Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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