You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
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