That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Randomize
