I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
