She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
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