I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
