Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
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