OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
