u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Randomize
