can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Randomize
