Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
