I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
textsfromlastnight.com keeps rejecting me
that alone proves you never get laid, nor have a life.. or have anything funny to contribute to the world.
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
