I love black thongs
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
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