when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize
