Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Randomize
