YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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