You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
Randomize
