I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
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