nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
He has the fingertips of a God
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