Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Randomize
