Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
