he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
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