Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
