my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
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