he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
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