what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Randomize
