somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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