at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
