try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Randomize
