So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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