Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Randomize
