Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Randomize
