So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Randomize
