So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
