jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Porn is love you can see.
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize
