Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Randomize
