i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
