I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Randomize