your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
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