Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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