I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
Randomize
