Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Randomize
