Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
