Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
Life is so much better after having sex.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
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