I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
Randomize
